The highlights of a very verbal seven days...
* "I'm not a doctor and can't comment on things I really don't know about" - Tony Adams sets the page for what we are already declaring is the strangest quote of the season...
* "Another time and place I got cramp because I put 20 pints of lager down my neck and got dehydrated. But with Jermain it's different, he drinks too much caffeine" - Adams' quoted explanation for why Defoe is currently suffering from injury. We did warn you it was an odd one.
* "When, as captain, some players come up to you and talk to you about a player - complaining about him - and then during the match you speak to this player and the player in question insults us. There comes a time where we can no longer comprehend how this can happen.I am trying to defend myself a bit without giving names. Otherwise I'm taking it all. It's very frustrating. I'm 31, the player is six years younger than me" - One of the incendiary extracts from William Gallas' suicide note as Arsenal captain.
* "We have to understand that, to be champions, you have to play big matches every weekend and fight. We are coming up against teams who are not scared to play football against us, who are not scared to take us on at our place, and this is becoming dangerous for Arsenal. We are not brave enough in battle" - Although it was very hard to disagree with everything he said...
* "The youngsters from the Euros seem cheeky, very sure of themselves. They think they know it all, but they don't know anything. Faced with his contempt, I raised my voice. The young player said: 'Lower your voice, speak less loudly'. I replied: 'How are you speaking to me? Who do you think you are? You are only 20 years old. I am not your friend. He said: 'Me neither, I am not your friend'" - Gallas confirms that he doesn't have many friends in the France squad either.
* I don't believe too much in leadership. I believe more in good passing than a guy who jumps around with the hands in the air and plays the leader" - Arsene Wenger can't work out the fuss.
* "Gallas will play against Kyiv. But he will not captain the team, it will be Cesc Fabregas. This is a permanent thing. But I don't think I especially have to explain why. I have given you information but I do not have to explain to you why I make these decisions" - Arsene's conclusion to the saga.
* "What you tend to find in the Premier League is that people seem to get upset dead easily" - Roy Keane's reflection on the Gallas row.
* "If that's the way he feels then leave him to it" - The Sunderland boss was no stranger to a rant during his time as Manchester United's captain.
* "It was his weekend off. He can do what he wants. Do you spend time with your girlfriend? Do you go to the cinema with her? Would you like her to kiss you now and then? That's what Artur has done. I still go to the cinema with my wife. I still kiss her. She doesn't like it, but there you go" - Gordon Strachan's reaction to Celtic keeper Boruc being photographed on a night out with a cigar in his mouth at an hour of the day which finds most of us in bed. Sleeping, we hasten to add.
* "They are a law unto themselves, aren't they? They make their own rules, bring their own people in on panels and make their own decisions. That is something that needs looking at. We are talking about one of the biggest leagues in the world, yet there seems to be a lack of common sense in the way it is run at times" - David Moyes doesn't take kindly to being fined a rather paltry £5,000 for his behaviour during Everton's match at Stoke in September.
* "It happens. It is my own fault" - Sir Alex Ferguson has changed. He's also mellow after being handed another touchline ban.
* The [disciplinary panel's] job is not to consider the performance level of referees. You will always get inconsistent decisions because every referee has their own opinions of things and his own judgement about things. That is one of the great things about our game. That has not changed from the day refereeing started" - But Fergie being Fergie gets his point in...
* "He's a malicious guy and if I hadn't jumped out of the way he would have broken my leg. He just lost it because we snuffed him totally out of the game. He had the nerve to say he didn't touch me but that's only because I got out of his way"- Brazil's Tiago Silva is not a fan of Cristiano Ronaldo.
* "When Nottingham Forest's England players left the club to go on international duty, Cloughie used to say 'Don't get injured'. When I went off with Northern Ireland, all he said to me was: 'Don't come back'" - Martin O'Neill.
* "I'm coping fine, but my wife is starting to suffer. I might have to send my family to Sardinia if we carry on like this" - Gianfranco Zola.
* "We've got a few good-looking lads here although I am not one of them" - Bolton skipper Kevin Nolan owns up.
* "I eat, drink, smoke football" - Joe Kinnear.
* "It would be nice if someone rang to apologise but I am not really expecting it. Stevie won't make the Fulham game and that means someone at the FA has made a massive mistake" - Rafa Benitez plays the victim after the FA decided to check on the severity of the Liverpool captain's injury. Well, if you did delay his operation for when England were playing Croatia...
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eamonndunphy
"Good ol gorden strachen..."
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